The Ugly Truth

You've heard the stories. They all begin with a beautiful tale about a young girl with exceptional potential and a bright future ahead. Then the story turns tragic and something terrible happens. She might have been a dancer or a runner or something along those lines, and then in the form of a car accident or some mysterious disease, she ends up losing both her legs. It's terrible. I cry every time. But the amazing thing is her attitude after it all. Somehow, she remains upbeat and positive in the face of adversity. She doesn't whine or complain. She doesn't turn bitter or blame anyone else. She rises above and becomes the shining example of how we should all be when faced with terrible hardships. And every time I hear a story like this I try to remind myself of how grateful I should be that I'm healthy and whole and truly blessed to have lived such a wonderful and (relatively) pain-free existence.

And then... I go and get myself pregnant. And once again, I have to face the ugly truth that I am NOT one of those girls. A couple of weeks ago pregnancy hit with a vengeance and I have not exactly been that shining example of how to overcome adversity with grace and style. Trust me, people, it hasn't been pretty. For those of you reading this who have gone through pregnancy without all the nausea and vomiting, I just want you to know that I forgive you. No, I'm only kidding, but seriously... why me? Can I just get that out of my system? I know, I know, it could be soooo much worse, and perhaps I should just hold off blogging until after I hit that magical week 16 (most people get over the morning sickness by week 12, by the way) because I worry that all of you will have to put up with nauseating amounts of complaining, but that's only fair right? If I have to be nauseated, I really think that everyone else should be too! Okay, I'm only kidding again... kind of. Oh, and that reminds me, who ever came up with the term "morning sickness?" A man, probably. Every time someone uses that term it just kills me. Morning? Really? What would I give for just morning sickness. Oh no, if I'm alive and breathing, then I'm sick.

Alright, I'm done. Thanks for putting up with that. I'll try to keep the complaints to a minimum from here on out. So here's the juice on the past couple of weeks. It's been kinda crazy. We had a little scare when I started spotting and they brought me in to do an ultrasound. Everything turned out okay. I'll spare you all the details but we saw the heartbeat and everything is fine. I had my first OB appointment a couple of days ago and I'm about 8 weeks along. My due date is July 23, and you'll all be proud to know that I didn't deck the nurse when she said that my "morning sickness" was a good thing. She said "a sick mommy is a healthy baby!!!" in a tone of voice that would have made me vomit even if I wasn't pregnant. The good news is that I love my doctor and, although I came prepared to beg, he happily handed over that magical prescription for Zofran. My maternity insurance doesn't kick in for another week or two, so I can't fill it yet (a 20 day supply costs about $400 without the insurance), but hopefully my posts will take on a much happier tone soon. My little friend, Zofran, has magical powers and can effectively take the edge off of that "morning sickness" I've come to love so much. Sometimes, when I'm feeling especially bad, I like to just hold the prescription in my hand and pretend that it's a pill bottle filled with lots of my little friends all arguing over who gets to be eaten first. How's that for insight into my soul?

Okay, enough of that. Wanna hear some good news? Rick has officially been offered a position with the FAA. Yep, a big packet came in the mail with all sorts of paperwork and instructions that will inevitably lead to another 3-6 months of waiting. They call it a tentative offer, which becomes firm after he passes extensive medical, security, and background checks. Unfortunately, this big packet contained no information about dates or what to expect in the future. That only comes after they scour our lives for anything illegal or generally unacceptable. Rick has been frantically filling out paperwork, peeing in little cups, and getting EKG's for the past week or so. They gave him a deadline of 10 days to complete just about everything and once again, we find ourselves wondering why they ask us to HURRY so dang much when they move at roughly the rate of cold molasses. Meanwhile, I continue to dwell in the land of denial, and thoughts of how this is going to play out are effectively set aside.

Well, that's about it for now. Hopefully the next time I write I'll be feeling much better, whether induced by drug or God's pity, it matters not. I hope everyone out there is having a super fantastic Christmas Season!

Search & Rescue

I've figured it out. The one thing that annoys me the absolute worst about having children. Believe it or not, it's not the runny noses, constant 2 year old tantrums, throwing up in the middle of the night or even the incessant whining. Those are all, at best, tolerable. There is just one little thing that may, in the end, be the one thing that sends me over the edge.

So, I've been sick for almost 3 days now. I've felt it coming on for the past 2 weeks and have been warding it off with mega doses of vitamins and fizzy wonder drinks. (Thank goodness for Emer'gen-C) Of course, it really hit hard on Thanksgiving and by that night, I was ready to give in. All of Friday and Saturday were spent on the couch in that half comatose state where you're awake because you've got a two year old to take care of, but the entire time you're wishing you were dead. In Noah's defense, he really was about as good as you could expect a little boy to be. In my defense, I didn't kill him so I think I was about as good as you could expect me to be.

It was early on Friday morning when Noah discovered some batteries that he'd left hidden some weeks ago in our closet. (He's a little like a dog burying a bone in that way. He'll find little knickknacks that he'll play with for a few days and then lose interest, leaving them in totally random spots around the house. It may be months before he'll go back and find them, at which time he'll pick up where he left off, playing with them as if it was his favorite thing to do all along.) He's been having a real love affair with these batteries on and off for the past year, it seems. He doesn't really do anything with them. He just likes to carry them around. So, anyways, he reunited (once again) with these batteries on Friday morning while I lay dying on the couch. He promptly brought them over to me so that I could appreciate his discovery. It really was perfect timing because he was starting to tire of playing with my salad spinner. But wait a second... you could almost see the wheels turning in his little brain. Batteries plus salad spinner. Oh, this could be good!

I kid you not, people. This kid of mine played with those stupid batteries and that dang spinner for hours! Take off the lid... put batteries in...put lid back on...pound frantically on the top to make those batteries spin spin spin spin spin...stop the spinning...take batteries out...put lid back on...aaaannnddd repeat. It was like manna from above. The perfect toy to keep a sick mother's child entertained for hours on end. That night I dreamt of ways to market the whole thing and sell it at Toys R Us.

Saturday morning arrived and, still sick, I resumed my position on the couch and Noah resumed playing with the batteries and the salad spinner. Only today, Noah threw in a little extra something and started adding cars and trucks into the mix. Man that thing can spin! It was about mid afternoon when it all began to lose its excitement. Noah finally quit spinning and went back to just holding the batteries in his hand. We watched some Curious George and read lots of books. I know, I know, you're all wondering what happened to the most annoying thing about having kids, right? Cue conversation:

Noah: Mama? Baah-yees? (That's "batteries" in 2 year old tongue)

Mama: Did you lose your batteries?

Noah: Uh-huh.

Mama: Uh-oh, you better go find them.

Noah: Uh-huh. (Said with blank, very expectant look in his eyes)

Mama: Noah, you can go look for your batteries. Go check in the kitchen.

Noah: (Walks into the kitchen, pauses, turns around and comes back) Mama? Baah-yees?

Mama: You checked the kitchen? Maybe they are over there by the computer.

Noah: (Walks over to the computer, pauses, turns around and comes back) Mama? Baah-yees?

We do this for every possible place that Noah could have left his batteries. Noah patiently pretends that he's actually looking for them, and I patiently (okay maybe not so patiently) keep suggesting more places to search. Finally, I get up, resigning myself to what I already knew from the moment he told me he lost them. I would have to go find this kid his stupid batteries. Guess where they were? For those of you who are mothers reading this right now, I'll bet you knew from the very beginning where those batteries were. Yup, that's right. They were in the kitchen, the first place I told him to check, on the floor, in plain sight, probably touching Noah's foot when he first went in there to "look" for them.

Well, the child is only 2, you kind of have to cut him a little slack. But, I am annoyed, not because this is happening now, but because I KNOW that this will continue to occur throughout his life. It is a male disease, I'm sure we are all aware. Oh, sure, it doesn't differentiate between males and females until a little later in life, but don't be deceived.

Case in point: I was watching my four nieces and nephews for about a week while my brother and his wife went out of town. (Sorry Heather, I only justify this because truly, my heart does go out to you). They have got 2 girls and 2 boys, and for the purposes of this post, I'll tell you that the younger boy, Ethan, is 4 and the older boy, Jared, is 8. I'm not kidding even a little when I tell you that Ethan lost his shoes at least a dozen times a day, every day. Mind you, these were the same shoes he had been wearing all day, the ones he had on not 5 minutes ago. We would do the whole search and rescue scenario that I just did with Noah, with exactly the same results. But again, he is only 4, so I would cut him a break. Jared, although not losing his shoes, would lose random things throughout the week, and inevitably I would end up finding them myself, as his own search results would turn up nothing.

Unfortunately, this disease does not cure itself over time. In fact, I'm fairly certain, although I haven't run any official studies, that no matter how early in life you start, no matter how hard you try to teach them, even grown men cannot escape this terrible ailment. Men do, however, learn better coping tools over time. And women have also learned to adapt. My husband, for example, has learned that it is a total waste of time to play the whole search and rescue game. And thankfully, my husband can communicate much more effectively than my 2 year old can. Rick has learned that 98.9% of the time, I can tell him exactly where something is located, without even having to enter the room. And at some point around the time I got married and had a child, my spidey mommy senses have become much more acute, and probably 73% of the time, I can even tell Rick what he's looking for and where it is before he ever asks.

So, while it annoys me to no end that my kid can't find his own stuff that is lying directly in his line of sight, I suppose that I can find some peace in the fact that someday, he'll just stop pretending to search, he'll marry a sweet girl who's spidey senses will develop quite rapidly, and all will fall into place exactly the way it was meant to be. If someone could just be so kind to remind me of that the next time Noah loses something? Thanks so much.

Hurry Up and Wait

It's done. Rick went for the interview, and once again, I find that all my stressing and worry was premature. Just a little background on a few things before I really go into it:

When Rick set up the interview, the man set it up to take place at the actual tower, which happens to be located at the air force base here in Albuquerque. This is unusual, we learned, because we originally thought that all interviewing took place at the actual FAA building that is located no where near the airport and/or the tower. Just so you know, there are a couple different jobs that a flight control specialist does. One is obviously the guy sitting up there in the tower giving clearance for the planes to take off and land. The other, which by the way is what we thought was what Rick would solely be doing, is the guy sitting behind that dark computer screen with those little green airplanes flashing and going in every which direction. (Think all those 911 movies you saw- it really does look like that). So okay, back on track, Rick was set up to interview at the tower, and we weren't really sure why. Well, once he got there, he asked the receptionist to explain. She went on to tell him that he was being interviewed at the tower because "the stars were aligned." In other words, Rick is one lucky dude. Apparently, most people get slated to work at the FAA building, and many of them are always trying to get over to the tower. Sometimes, people from the tower will move over to the FAA site, and then spend who knows how long trying to get back to the tower. The tower is, according to several people Rick talked to, the cool place to be. Not only do you get to do more jobs, but there is one other VERY great thing about it. Okay wait, one more piece of background:

Once Rick completes the training in Oklahoma, he gets back and starts working at a very base level of pay. Nothing to scream about really. Then, he spends the next forever and a day taking various certification courses, test, etc. to up his rank and therefore up his pay. He learned today at the interview that, if you're at the FAA site, some of these courses can take a VERY long time to get into. The majority of the people work at the FAA building, so therefore you're competing with a lot more people to work your way up. There are only a handful of people at the tower, and therefore, it is much easier and much quicker to make your way up.

The good news is that Rick found out today, that should he get the job, he is actually slated to work there at the tower. It sounded like a pretty rare thing, but apparently there were a number of people that had either retired or moved and it just so happened that they have 4 positions to fill over there. What a blessing... Rick will hopefully fill one of them.

There's more. I know, this is taking forever. Sorry. So, he did the whole interview thing in front of 3 men. Here's the bad news. These guys told Rick that they actually aren't the ones to make the final decision. According to them, they send back their "recommendation" to Oklahoma, and they (whoever they are) make the final say. So, pretty much, as long as Rick didn't make a total idiot out of himself, then they'll send over a positive recommendation and Oklahoma will then contact Rick with a tentative job offer. I say tentative, because this is when Rick has to go through a pretty extensive health check and security clearance. Since we all know that he has excellent eye sight, is not dying from cancer and/or a mental illness, has never held up a drug store, and has never been in jail, I feel pretty confident that he'll pass this portion of the ride. For those of you who have either gone through this yourself or have spouses that have, please feel free to let me know if I should begin the worrying process over this. (Insert nervous laughter now).

Ready for some more good news? The men told Rick that the training out in Oklahoma differs depending on which classes you get put in. This explains why the FAA website (where Rick initially applied) officially states that the training program is "several weeks" long. Then we heard from another source that it was actually 4 months long. Recently, we were informed through the grape vine that someone in our stake had just completed the training and he was gone for SIX months. Needless to say, I was starting to worry a little. Well, they finally cleared it up for me by adding it to the list of variables that are yet to be answered. We learned today that the shortest training session is only 11 weeks long. Can you believe it? There is a chance, cross your fingers everyone, that Rick may only have to go for less than 3 months! Once again, we are trying not to get excited too early, but we are DEFINITELY hoping.

Alright, so they took him on a whole tour of the tower and told him that they had heard that some people were receiving replies from Oklahoma in as little as two days. Their exact words were: You're dealing with the government. You better hurry up and wait. (That one's for you, Nate & Shayla!) So... for those of you hoping to hear today that we got the job, get in line people! Once again, I'll keep you posted...

The Winds of Change

I have been thinking all week about writing this blog. And since it's been almost a month since I last posted anything, I've got some serious blogger brain going on. (You know what I'm talking about... the longer you go without a post the more you tend to start writing them in your head and then leaving them half finished, only to start a completely new one the next time you have more than half a second to think your own thoughts. No? Just me? That doesn't happen to everyone? Okay, never mind then.)

So, it has been my intention to do an "update" post for more than a few weeks now. I got a phone call (quite a while ago, might I add) from my sister-in-law, Stephanie, who was convinced that my lack of an update on the pregnancy endeavor was for sure a sign that I was pregnant and holding out on everyone. I had to reassure her that that wasn't the case, and I became aware that perhaps there might be others out there thinking the same thing. Well, time kept passing and my well-intentioned "update post" kept getting pushed back, and now I find that my updates have changed.

Okay, just to keep everyone in total suspense, I'm going to start with the job stuff. Seriously... you all remember my total craziness that has accompanied me throughout this job opportunity with the FAA. Well, we finally heard from the them. We knew he had passed the test, and we knew that he might get contacted for an interview. The next thing we got was an e-mail telling us that he will get contacted for an interview, but keep waiting until further notice. Then we got another e-mail saying pretty much the same thing, but from another department. This happened about three more times, until finally we got a phone call from someone who, heaven help us, is actually located here in Albuquerque. After a week of trying to actually make contact with this guy, it has finally been set. Rick has an interview on Monday, and now my anxiety over the unknown has started to turn into anxiety over what I do know. We've heard from a few people that have gone through this process before that if you make it to the interview stage, it's pretty much done. The interview isn't so much an interview, but a meeting to make the job offer. So, while trying not to get too prematurely excited, we are definitely feeling blessed. I'm not even going to go into how totally freaked I am about the fact that if Rick gets this job, then that means 6 months of training out in Oklahoma City. Six months that may or may not take Noah and I with him. What was the distant future is starting to hit a little closer to home. I choose to remain in complete denial about this aspect of the job.

So, in total Jennifer style and just to mix things up a little bit, there is one more tiny bit of update that makes things kinda crazy. Like I said, my every intention was to let you all know that there wasn't any news on the baby front, and up until very recently, that remained unchanged. Yep, your eyes are not deceiving you, just last week I found out that I am pregnant. It's kind of a funny story, with lots of details that would probably be too much information, but suffice to say that somehow I managed to be "trying" for 5 months and still be completely shocked when it actually happened. I'm not very far along at all, and probably would never have made the announcement so soon, but I get the distinct feeling that the timing of all of this was soooo out of my hands. I was deathly ill thus far into my pregnancy with Noah, and seriously thought I was going to die throughout the entire first 4 months, but so far this pregnancy has been kind. In fact, there are moments when I even wonder if I'm really pregnant at all. I pray that it remains that way. I fear that Rick will get this job and have to leave his sick, pregnant wife and 2 year old for the majority of my pregnancy. I fear even more that he'll get this job and things will continue to move in the snails pace that they have been all along, and he'll have to leave his not so sick but VERY pregnant wife with a 2 year old and a looming delivery without him. Okay... and that's my cue to embrace my denial and stop thinking about it. At least for now. In the mean time, Yay! I'm pregnant! We're very excited and although I haven't been to the doctor for an official date, the baby will probably be here sometime in mid-July.

Well, that's enough update for now. I'm sure I'll have oodles more to talk about after Rick's interview on Monday. Stay tuned...

International Balloon Fiesta

It may be our only real claim to fame, but seriously... check out some of these photos! The International Balloon Fiesta that happens every year here in Albuquerque certainly is quite a site to behold. These first couple of pictures were taken at the Saturday Morning Mass Ascension. Literally thousands of balloons from all over the world gather for this event and the crowds are unbelievable. Rick had to work, but Noah and I took the "park and ride" down to the park. (This was Noah's first time on a bus and that practically deserves a whole post all to itself. Seriously... the boy almost had a coronary, he was so excited...) This year was the first time I've made it out for a Mass Ascension... waking up and getting down to the park by 6:30 am was almost too much to ask... but after getting down there, it was sooooo worth it.


As you can see from that last picture, there are lots of fun shapes to be seen up in the air during the week of Balloon Fiesta. By far the best event takes place later on in the week. It's called the Special Shapes Glowdeo, and although none of the balloons actually take flight, it's a blast to see them all lit up at night. Just before sundown all the balloons start taking shape. There are speakers set up throughout the whole park and they start counting down to the "all glow." All of the balloons simultaneously light up and the whole park comes alive with crazy shapes. The pictures aren't the best (mainly because I spent 3/4 of the times trying to figure out what setting would be best on my camera), but you get the idea.

Darth Vader was a new addition this year... honestly, it was a little creepy to see his head just floating around in the sky every morning.

And just because my boys are so super cute, I had to throw in this one last picture. To give you a little background, Noah has recently started to appreciate the novelty of saying "cheese" during the whole picture taking process. Well, every time a balloon would light up, he would look at it and say "cheese!!!" with his eyes all scrunched up. How cute is that?

Early Release Due to Sneaky Behavior

There was nothing unusual about this day to make me think that my life was about to change. My morning had been spent frantically trying to catch up on things that should have been done yesterday. (Alright, alright... a week ago... but who's counting, right?) After deciding, yet again, what lunch to feed my ever increasingly picky eater, I finally reached my favorite time of day... nap time. My heart skipped a beat at the thought of a whole hour (or hopefully two) ALL TO MYSELF. I dreamt of sitting and watching something very non-animated... maybe even taking a nap. That made me chuckle a little as I settled for a few minutes to balance the checkbook in peace. Time flew by and I knew that things would be coming to a close very shortly. I heard him stirring in the next room... I said a silent prayer that today would be that lucky day that he would roll over and go back to sleep for another 10 minutes. Allowing myself to slip a little deeper into that mommy selective hearing mode, I suddenly jumped when he appeared out of the corner of my eye...

Wait... what?!? How in the...?... Nooooo!!!! The time had come. My dear sweet boy... the one who keeps me running from morning 'til night. The overactive 2 year old that just wont stop. The one who had NEVER shown even an ounce of interest in finding his own way out of that wonderful invention, the crib. Suddenly, my one last haven... was gone. First, he learned to crawl. Then, he learned to walk. Even when he learned how to open and close doors. Through it all, I could always count on the crib. The one thing that would always keep things exactly where and how I wanted them. Safe, happy, LOCKED UP. In the blink of an eye, it was gone.

And that is what it's like to have children, isn't it? The moment that you think you've finally nailed down a good routine, and things are flowing kind of smoothly... wham! Your world flips upside down and you have to start from scratch. New plan. New routine.

So, now we've got the "big boy bed." (We received a great toddler bed from my sister here in Albuquerque). And you all know how that plays out. Days, weeks, even months of convincing your child that after over 2 years of being behind bars, they should actually choose to stay in bed on their own. Right.

So that has been my life for the past week. I know all parent have to go through it, in some form or another. But seriously... sometimes you have to stop and wonder about it all. But here I sit. My husband is in bed, and yes, even the boy is finally fast asleep in his non-crib. We'll just pretend for now that things will stay that way all night...

Just Sleep On It

So you're all going to think me a little crazy, and I wasn't even planning on blogging about this, but I've just got to talk a little about one of the greatest shows on TV right now. Well, technically, the new season of 24 doesn't begin until January, but I am at this very moment sitting on my couch watching a rerun from season 4 while typing this post. And might I add that although it's been said before (Heather you were so right), if the world were ending at this very moment I would seriously want Kiefer Sutherland by my side. I know, I know... only a mere actor... but any of you who have watched (and therefore most assuredly loved) this show, would have to admit that Kiefer Sutherland will forever more be known as Jack Bauer. Rick and I had never even seen an episode of 24 until earlier this year when we finally caved and rented season one. After dropping off the face of the earth to watch seasons 1-5 over the space of a few weeks, it all came to a screeching halt when we were informed that season 6 would not be released on DVD until December. Since then we've been anxiously counting down the days until we can be officially caught up and then start season 7 with everyone else. Is it wrong that my excitement for Christmas comes in 2nd place to the season 6 DVD release?

Okay, so on with the real stuff... Let me just preface this by letting you know that I have re-learned a very valuable lesson over the past week. In case any of you out there are feeling like you should be accomplishing more in your lives... like perhaps your endless hours of work just aren't enough... like maybe you need to try to take on just one more thing... take my word for it... just wait!

As I mentioned in my last post, about a month ago I started working 1 day a week down at my brother's podiatry practice. It was going quite well and I was really starting to enjoy my "adult time" while also helping out in the financial department at home. After talking it over with Rick, and since I was so obviously handling my supermom role with ease (sarcasm intended), it was decided that I would bump things up to work 2 days a week. Things continued to flow quite smoothly until Sunday came and we got a call to come into church early to meet with a member of the bishopric. (Yeah, we all know what that means...) Wouldn't you know it, I was called to be the 1st Counselor of the Primary Presidency. I was totally psyched about it. I've never been in a presidency before and although I have no clue what I'm doing, I am super excited about it. There are a few things that make this calling a little more stressful than I had anticipated, though. Turns out that our primary is a big one. I mean, I knew it was big... but whoa... We have 4 nursery's, 3 sunbeam classes, and 2 of almost all the other classes. Our nurseries have over 50 kids in them alone. The entire primary consists of over 150 kids. Many of the classes have over 15 kids in them, but we can't split them because there's simply no more room in the building. (Our building houses 4 wards each Sunday). It has been confirmed that a new building will be added in our neighborhood, but they haven't even broken ground yet. Even so, I think this is going to be so much fun! So, this last week we had two presidency meetings in order to get things transitioned over from the old presidency. As it happens... they were smack dab in the middle of preparing for the primary program which is scheduled for next month. After the meeting ended the previous presidency looked decidedly relieved... and all of us in the new presidency had a few new gray hairs.

So, I have to admit, I'm kind of starting to wonder about my decision to take on another day at work. Having said that, I realize that this week was a little more crazy than normal, and I'm not giving in quite yet. For future reference though... the next time I think I need to take on something more, I think I'll give it a little more time... wait for life to catch up... it always does.

On a side note, we still haven't heard anything from the FAA. Part of me is not surprised at all, while the other part of me is starting to wonder. It took 2 months for them to contact us the first time, so I suppose we might be right on track. Seriously, though... if Rick doesn't end up getting an interview... couldn't they at least let us know that we were out of the running?!?

Well, it's after midnight and my rerun of 24 is over... I guess it's time for bed. Tomorrow is my first Sunday in primary and it's my month to conduct. Wish me luck!

Silly Superstitions

Alright, I have a confession to make. I am by nature a very superstitious person, which is odd, in that the very idea of fate, destiny and/or serendipity, etc. actually go against what my logical core beliefs are. I know quite certainly that there is a God, and that he indeed wants me to be happy. I know that the good things that happen in life are blessings, not "luck". I know that if something doesn't workout the way I think it should, it's not because I walked under a ladder or opened that umbrella inside the house and simply fated myself to "7 years of bad luck." You see, I KNOW these things... but I have to admit that I've been avoiding my blog over the past few weeks because my silly superstitious nature has gotten the best of me!

Some of you are aware of our never-ending search for a better job, and hopefully the answer to the still unanswered school question that's been hanging over our heads. Well, a lot of you probably know that a couple of months ago, Rick applied for an air traffic control position with the FAA. It being a government position, we knew not to hold our breath since, A. It was a long shot, and B. Even if they did consider him, the government officially moves at roughly the speed of cold molasses. Well as it turned out, two months after applying, we received a phone call saying that Rick's application made it through the first "weed-out" and that he was asked to move onto the next step which was a long (and rather stupid, might I add) test. It turned out to be horrible timing, since the test was being given on the day that Rick had a very important district-wide manager meeting. It was beginning to look like we either had to throw out the FAA job (and the possibility of a future career) or Rick would simply have to skip work and pray that they wouldn't fire him. (For those of you who know Rick, this second option was almost not an option for the poor boy. He is about the hardest worker you'll ever know, rarely misses work even when sick, and would NEVER leave an employer in a lurch. If you need evidence of that, ask me about the time he tried to go to work with over 14" of snow on the ground and got stuck in the driveway... it's a funny story) Anyways, since neither of us wanted to make that decision, we decided to pray about it and then avoid it until the very last second. :-) We knelt down to pray before Rick left for work that morning and I'm not kidding you... Rick called me within 2 hours and told me that he'd gotten a message that his meeting had suddenly been cancelled and he would now be free to take that day off and go take the test. Talk about your not-so-everyday lightning bolt. At this point I'm fairly certain that this whole experience may just kill me. I am NOT a patient person. I like to be in control of things, and when I decide on something, I like to act upon it immediately. I'm not dead yet, but I've informed Rick to add a post to my blog informing all of you when I finally die from the unknown. :-)

So, back on Aug. 21st, Rick took the test. He was nervous, I was nervous, it was bad. Once again, we were told to WAIT. They said that within 7-10 days we'd get a letter in the mail letting us know if he passed or not. Lucky for me and my total impatience, I remembered that when he applied online, there was a place to check the status of your application and the whole process. A couple of days ago it was updated to show that Rick PASSED the test!!! I thought after knowing whether he passed or not that I would be able to relax. WRONG. Now, they tell us that his application, resume, and test results were sent off to the office here in Albuquerque to be reviewed. It's waiting time again. The website officially says: you may or may not be contacted for an interview. Are these people freakin' kidding me?!?

The first thing I wanted to do after hearing he'd gotten accepted to take the test, was come write about it on my blog. And THEN... the superstitions crept in... What if I jinxed it? What if, by telling people how excited I was, I caused the fates to step in and put me back in my place? Isn't the universe just that cruel?!? I know, it sounds stupid. But I kept my itching fingers away from the keyboard and daydreamed about the future blog I would write. And then the Lord really answered our prayers by opening up that door for us and allowing Rick to test. I thought for sure that meant something, right? The Lord wouldn't go to all that trouble if He didn't think that this job was a good thing, right? I put those thoughts aside pretty quickly. I know better than to pretend to know what God is thinking. :-) Sometimes an entire experience can merely be for the benefit of learning. Tough as it may be. So, I definitely couldn't write in my blog before we knew whether Rick had passed. I promised myself that once I got the results, if they were good, I would then allow myself to get excited. When I got the results I was all ready to share the great news. But once again I started to fear that possibility of "jinxing" it. I've been stalling for the past 3 days. But today I decided that I couldn't stand it anymore, and although this whole thing may completely fall through, I am just too excited about the possibility to stay quiet. That, and I desperately need all of you to start praying for us!!!! :-)

Okay, that's enough about the job stuff. That took way longer than I thought it would. But before I go, I need to make a little shout-out in honor of my in-laws. They have recently agreed to start watching Noah 1 day a week to allow me to work a little more. Noah adores them and it's such a blessing not to worry about leaving him with people he isn't totally comfortable with. He is the first and only grandchild for them and he loves all the attention. And, because people keep telling me that I need to put pictures on my blog, I thought I would start out with one of the boy playing with his new "Mac Truck" that grandma and grandpa bought him.

Can I just say that I've got the cutest little boy EVER?!?

Broken Binkies!!!

I finally did it. After weeks of deliberating over it and stalling for as long as possible, I finally caved and decided it was time to say good-bye to the binkies. I am aware that such a topic might not exactly qualify as a super entertaining read, but seriously, I just have to get this off my chest.

So, after spending yesterday morning gathering all of the many displaced binkies throughout the house, I carefully snipped the tip of one of them and placed it in an obvious location where Noah would surely come looking. Surprisingly enough, he suddenly became quite content without his one true love and it took a couple of hours before he realized he wanted one. Let me just tell you, folks, that it is indeed possible to break the heart of a two year old, and I'm fairly certain that I just did it. The poor boy popped that pacifier right into his mouth without even noticing the lack of silicone on the tip! And if you could only have seen his face!!! Immediately his forehead crumpled and he pulled it out to investigate what could possible have occurred. He appeared so confused that I went to kneel by his side and explain that his binky must have "broken" and that it was time to throw it away. He finally noticed the little stub that had been lying there, and picked it up, trying to reattach it to the binky. He looked up at me with these imploring eyes, and asked me to "fits it!" I contemplated getting the tape out just to really drive the point home and merely for the entertainment of watching him try to suck on a binky that was all taped up, but didn't think I could manage it without laughing, so I opted not to. For the next hour or so, I tried to convince Noah that it was time to throw the binky away. He would slowly set it in the trash can, take two careful steps back, and then come rushing back only to yank it back up and stare at it longingly in his hands. After a few episodes of this, he finally threw it away once and for all and promptly forgot about everything. You'd think that would be a good thing, but as it turns out, it wasn't so great. When I said "forgot about everything" I mean literally... he forgot about the entire incident. Every 30 minutes or so, he'd come asking for a binky as if expecting me to reach into my pocket and hand him one. I'd have to replay the whole thing for him. "Don't you remember, Noah? The binky broke. You had to put it in the garbage. Remember?" Insert crumpling forehead and confused, betrayed look now. ALL AFTERNOON!!! We must have done this a dozen times!

Well, as it turned out, bedtime wasn't nearly as hard as I expected it to be. He went to bed really well without the binky and so far today hasn't been too bad either. He still comes asking for a binky every once in a while, but he doesn't act real surprised when I remind him that there are no more binkies to be had. All-in-all, I'm glad I did it the way I did. If you've ever heard Shayla's binky story, it's very similar to this one and she's actually the one who gave me the idea. Although, from what I remember, she actually did grab the tape, which totally cracks me up, by the way.

Alright, enough about my binky ordeal! One more time, though... can somebody please remind me why we have children? And why I'm actually trying to have more?!?

Tag! I'm it!

I've been tagged!!! This is all about me, given in one word answers. Can you believe it? Two blogs, two days in a row!

Yourself: enduring

Your partner: committed

Your hair: frustrating

Your mother: astonishing

Your father: solid

Your dream last night: none

Your favorite drink: Dr. Pepper

Your dream car: bigger

Your home: owned

The room you are in: office

Your fear: inadequacy

Where you want to be in 10 years: confident

Who you hung out with last night: family

You're not: quitter

One of your wish list items: house

The last thing you did: telephone

You are wearing: pajamas

Your favorite weather: sunshine

Your favorite book: many

Last thing you ate: milk

Your life: blessed

Your mood: anxious

Your best friend: Rick

What you are thinking about right now: Lists

Your car: Honda

What are you doing at the moment: blogging

Relationship status: eternity

What is on your TV: Cars

When is the last time you laughed: today


I'm tagging you, Becky! You're it!

The Return From Neverland

Last night we finally got back home from our family reunion down in eastern AZ. It's Rick's side of the family, and since we didn't get to go last year, we were both really excited about it this year. It's been a family tradition (since the beginning of time, it seems) for everybody to congregate up in the mountains of eastern AZ for a week long camping trip every summer. This year, we were lucky enough to have an awesome brother and sister-in-law let us borrow some serious camping toys to make life LOTS of fun up there. We loaded up the truck, trailer, and quad last Friday and headed out of town. We had a great time up there and now I'm back home facing LOADS of laundry, dirt caked on just about every possible thing that accompanied us, and a huge trailer parked outside our house that needs to be cleaned before we return it. To make matters worse, the trailer we borrowed has only been used by the actual owners a handful of times, and I'm fairly certain that we managed to break it in quite effectively since it rained nearly every day we were up there. Hopefully my family wont ban us from using any of their toys in the future. Obviously, my plan is to spend the day cleaning every last inch of it.

Just as an update for those of you who are wondering about our baby issue, still nothing to report. Oddly enough, I spent a few hours feeling really bummed out, but wasn't as upset as I thought I would be. I know that Heavenly Father can see soooooo much more than I can, and am pretty sure that it'll happen when/if he wants it to. (Wow... that sounded so much more confident than I actually feel like 90% of the time)

So, I just made the mistake of pausing for a moment and turning around to look at the huge pile of bags that still need to be unpacked. Guilt got the best of me... I guess I'll get back to work...

Weight Watcher Woes...

So, Rick and I have decided to try and get pregnant again. Technically, we went off the pill about a month ago and I have been curiously waiting to see if it would happen as quickly as it did the first time. Alas, it wasn't meant to be, as I found out yesterday that I wasn't pregnant yet. A part of me was disappointed, but I found myself strangely relieved in a way. Not that I don't want to have another baby, but I'd really like to be a LITTLE closer to my goal weight before I pack it all back on. So, I'm thinking to myself that now I've got another month to do the whole Weight Watcher's thing, but jumping back into it has proven to be WAY harder than expected.

My sister, Shayla, came down to visit for about 3 weeks, and at the time I decided to not worry about the whole diet thing. After all, we don't get to see each other all that often and frankly, eating is like the best thing you could possibly do while doing nothing! Well, to make things even worse, I've been having a lot of problems with my elliptical lately, and since it's been like pulling teeth to get it fixed, my whole exercise regimen also got put aside. Alright, so I've gained 4 pounds since Shayla arrived, and she left almost a week ago. Last Thursday, to be exact. And I thought that once she left, I'd just pick up where I left off and get back on track. Well, I don't feel bad about the weight gain, I expected that would occur. And it was totally worth the 4 extra pounds! But like I said, she left last Thursday and I woke up Friday morning feeling totally deflated. I mean, seriously, I just crashed all day. I felt like I was the one coming home from vacation and having to face reality again! I need my sister here permanently! So I chucked Friday and determined to start again on Saturday. But when I woke up on Saturday morning I found myself justifying. I mean, really, who starts fresh on a Saturday? I should just enjoy the weekend and start new on Monday. Haha.... Cue Monday morning... I did it! I got on the elliptical and did my thing (almost killing myself in the process, might I add.) I ate a good healthy breakfast and lunch, counting my points like a good girl, and following the weight watcher plan. But then Rick called to let me know he was getting off early and wanted to go see the new Transformers movie and since we still had a gift card to Olive Garden, we'd go there for dinner. Just so you know, it IS possible to stay on plan and still go out to eat. That fact, however, must have slipped my mind since I ended up TOTALLY blowing the rest of the day. Then, yesterday was Tuesday and I found out I wasn't pregnant. That kind of news certainly deserved at least a burger and fries, and oooohhhh.... the cherry Dr. Pepper. Tuesday went down the drain. Okay, so now it's Wednesday, and so far I think I'm doing a little better. Ask me again in 5 minutes and I might say something else, though. I did work out today, but then Amanda and I went out to lunch at Chili's. I only got the soup and salad and I nixed the soda. So, technically, I haven't gone over on points today, but at any given moment I may be reaching for that pan of brownies that Rick had me make him last week...

Enough about my weight woes! I just needed to vent my craziness. Wish me luck!!

100 Things About Me

Here it is... the list of 100 things about me. Enjoy!

1. I am 24 years old, married, and have an (almost) 2 year old son named Noah.
   

2. I have lived in Albuquerque for about 4 ½ years, and in that time have come to only slightly dislike it. (Seeing as how I really hated it when I first arrived, that’s really saying something.)
   

3. I lived in Washington State my entire life until I graduated from high school, at which time I ran as far away from Longview as I possibly could (Florida, see #4).
   

4. I lived in 4 different states in the period of just over 1 year. Washington, Florida, Idaho and then finally New Mexico.
   

5. Although a west coaster by birth, I’m totally an east coaster at heart.
   

6. I joined Weight Watchers 5 weeks ago and have established a real love/hate relationship with the program.
   

7. My husband finally caved and bought me an elliptical about a year ago. I harbor no hatred for my beloved elliptical, however. I workout like a mad woman 6 days a week, and that machine is what keeps me sane.
   

8. I have 5 older brothers and 2 older sisters.
   

9. I’m terrible at long distance relationships. I’m constantly trying to improve my e-mailing, phone calling, and just any contacting in general, really. If you know me, then you know this terrible trait of mine already.
   

10. I consider myself to be a very loyal friend. I may be terrible at keeping in touch, and it may have been months since we last talked, but say only one word and I will literally drop everything and come running.
    

11. My favorite color is sage green.
    

12. I’ve had asthma since birth.
    

13. I could live off carbonated drinks, but have had to seriously curb my addiction since it’s so totally terrible for you.
    

14. I finished over a year of college by the time I graduated high school.
    

15. I was majoring in nursing when I met Rick and stopped going to school so he could. I don’t regret it at all, but still dream of getting my degree someday.
    

16. I would love to work as a labor/delivery nurse or as a nurse in the NICU.
    

17. My husband calls me “Monica Gellar” because I’m so freakishly organized and clean all the time.
    

18. I work on an as needed basis for my brother (he’s a podiatrist), doing credentialing work for all the insurance companies.
    

19. I have 22 nieces and nephews, have had LOTS of babysitting experience, thought I was as prepared as I could be to have children of my own, and was TOTALLY blown away when I got pregnant and had my own son. I now know that there is NO SUCH THING as being prepared for children.
    

20. There are two things I’d like to do before I die. One, I’d like to visit Australia. Two, I’d love to go sky diving. (Rick says, “no way” to #2… so we’ll see…)
    

21. I love to scrapbook and make cards, but never spend enough time with it.
    

22. I miss the water more than anything. I’ve always lived near the ocean and would give anything to live closer.
    

23. I’m SUPER critical of myself and wish I could stop caring so much what people think of me.
    

24. My biggest fear in life is not being “enough.”
    

25. My best friend here in Albuquerque is Amanda. She’s almost as quirky and crazy as I am.
    

26. Two weeks ago we got Dish, and I think my life has changed FOREVER! It’s not the extra channels… it’s the DVR!!!
    

27. My husband and I both agree that we wouldn’t have liked each other had we known each other in high school.
    

28. I LOVE food. I have a very emotional relationship with it and find much comfort in cooking, smelling and especially eating it.
    

29. I love to read and have to be careful when I start a new book. It has to be timed right or whatever else I’m doing at the time gets totally forgotten and neglected.
    

30. I love to sing and wish I could start voice lessons again.
    

31. I compare myself to everyone and everything. It’s a terrible habit and I never measure up!
    

32. I HATE speaking in public, but can actually fake it pretty well.

33. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I’m only 24.

34. My husband is totally mechanically minded. If it can be done with your hands, than he can do it. He has an understanding of cars that I will NEVER get, but totally adore. I love that he can fix almost anything in the house that breaks, and if he doesn’t know how to fix it, he totally digs learning how. And I am the kind of woman that LOVES that about my man!
    

35. I breastfed my baby for the first two weeks until we both got an infection, and then we got it again, and again and again… I finally quit and wish I didn’t have to.
    

36. I want to breastfeed my future babies, but am scared that I have been too spoiled with Noah on a bottle. It was so easy!!!
    

37. I thought I was going to die the first 4 months of my pregnancy. I lost 10 pounds and was sick all day, every day. It amazes me that someday I am going to actually choose to do it all over again!
    

38. I love to light two candles in my living room and sit on my couch after I’ve cleaned the whole house. There is something so calming about a clean home… Is that totally demented?
    

39. I have to consciously tell myself to let go of the control. It’s an anxiety issue of mine.

40. I LOVE Mexican food.

41. I would take humid heat over dry heat any day.
    

42. I’m sitting here wondering why I thought I could ever come up with 100 things about me…
    

43. I’m a total impulse buyer… Rick is NOT. It’s been a real learning experience.
    

44. I do all the finances in our family. I love Quicken.
    

45. I wish I had a piano. It’s very therapeutic.
    

46. I love mail. Snail mail, e-mail, you name it. Even if it’s a bill with my name on it, it makes me feel special.
    

47. My son hasn’t figured out how to climb out of his crib yet, and so far doesn’t show any interest. I’m wondering if it’s okay for me to keep him in there until he’s at least 12?
    

48. I love to drive. I’d take a stick shift over an automatic any day. I know it’s bad, but the faster the better.
    

49. I’m one of the few wives out there that doesn’t tell my husband to slow down the car… don’t ask me how many tickets he’s gotten since we met.
    

50. I’ve never gotten a speeding ticket.
    

51. I love doing abs workouts. I love the pain that comes the next day even more.
    

52. I love my room right after I’ve made my bed.
    

53. I HATE that my husband always tries to sit on the bed after I’ve made it. He wrinkles it!!!
    

54. I’m a creature of habit. I love schedules and plans, almost to a fault.
    

55. Noah is a first grandchild on Rick’s parents’ side. I love how much they love him!
    

56. I daydream about all the clothes I want to wear after I lose the weight!
    

57. I absolutely abhor running, but secretly wish I loved it.
    

58. My son became utterly obsessed with trucks before the age of 1. I’m starting to crave a baby girl.
    

59. I love my hair with highlights, and only wish I had the money to do it and keep it up.
    

60. My husband bought me a Mogu pillow (they feel like they are filled with sand) when I was pregnant, and now I can’t sleep without it.
    

61. Now that we’ve got so much family living so close to us, I’m secretly scared that we’ll never leave Albuquerque.
    

62. I really don’t like water but drink oodles of it every day.
    

63. I wish I had a truck.
    

64. We’d like to have 4 kids, but just thinking about it makes my heart skip a little. I’m totally overwhelmed with just one some days.
    

65. I love making grocery lists. I love crossing them off even more.
    

66. I always like to have a blanket on me. If I’m hot, then I’ll take off some clothes so I can have the blanket.
    

67. I think I have cute feet.
    

68. I’m secretly having a love affair with potatoes. I love them. Any way, shape, or form.
    

69. I love birthdays. I make a huge deal out of them and want the same in return for mine.
    

70. I have tiny ears. Seriously, if you know me but haven’t noticed, just look next time you see me. You’ll see.
    

71. I HATE being video taped.
    

72. I can’t roll my R’s. My husband laughs and calls me a “gringo”.
    

73. I went to New York City for Thanksgiving right after 9/11. It was amazing and I dream of going back.
    

74. I love when my husband tells corny, stupid jokes.
    

75. I’m a glass half full type of person most days.
    

76. I’m terrible at taking pictures and always wish I had more of my family.
    

77. Rick and I want to serve multiple missions after we retire.
    

78. Blogging is totally new to me but I hope it sticks.
    

79. I’ve got what our family refers to as an “Ivey nose”, which pretty much means BIG. Having said that, my sisters tell me that mine isn’t so bad, and my wonderful husband denies that I have a big nose at all, bless his heart.
    

80. I hated P.E. in school.
    

81. I love to sew.
    

82. My sister and I once made up a song about the BK Hershey Sundae Pies they sell at Burger King. They are wonderful creations.
    

83. Now that I think about it, the song actually included a few verses about their French fries, the Whopper Jr., and I believe it was sung to the tune of “Oh, Christmas Tree”.
    

84. My husband laughs at me because I was born in the 80’s.
    

85. My first job was at a tiny little café. I was awesome at making any kind of coffee drink, latte, etc. but never tasted any of them.
    

86. I hate the smell of coffee.
    

87. I once received roses from 3 different guys on Valentines Day.
    

88. There’s an ice cream man that drives through our neighborhood every day. His music annoys me.
    

89. I was born in Walla Walla, Washington, and my husband laughs every time I say that.
    

90. I wish I was more creative with my hair.
    

91. I’m addicted to my son’s pacifier. It can make him stop crying instantly!
    

92. I’m scared to even THINK about potty training Noah. He shows absolutely NO interest in it.
    

93. I love to take kick boxing classes.
    

94. I once tried a spinning class and thought I was going to die.
    

95. The best class I ever took at college was an Intercultural Communications course.
    

96. I used to collect the tabs from pop cans.
    

97. I’m a cowgirl at heart.
    

98. My son is addicted to The Backyardigans and I have seen EVERY episode at least a hundred times.
    

99. I actually kind of enjoy doing laundry, although I hate folding it.
    

100. I can’t believe I actually came up with 100 things, but realize that the minute I post this blog, I’ll come up with at least a hundred more!

Alright... I cave!

So, I'm giving in. After months and months of hearing about and reading other blogs, I'm finally caving. I have to admit, however, that for some odd reason this is a lot harder than I expected it to be. I actually set up my account on blogger like a month ago, and from time to time I come to look at my very empty blog and try to convince myself to get started. But, even with all of the millions of things that I would like to talk about, I find myself totally speechless. So here I am, on a day that is absolutely no different from any other day, and I'm totally caving.

It all began with my sister who lives up in Washington. (I know you're reading this right now, Shayla... Hi!) I really owe it all to her. Both my desire to start blogging and my absurd fear of it. I love reading her blogs and hearing about her days and it got me all excited to start my own, and then I'd think a little harder and realized that the reason I loved her blogs was because she was so freakin' good at it! She never fails to me make me laugh, if only because I can relate so ridiculously to half the things she says. She's an amazing writer and it suddenly occurred to me that perhaps my blogs wouldn't be nearly as much fun as hers. And then, back to the other hand, I think of how much I miss her and with life being so crazy and things getting in the way, her blog in many ways makes me feel like the gap between states isn't quite as large. So here I am, trying to close the gap a little more... between her and perhaps anybody else who stumbles upon my craziness.

Shayla was telling me that a good way to begin blogging is by doing the whole "100 Things About Me" post. Which, by the way, when I really start thinking about it too hard, I can come up with, like... 3. Don't laugh... it's a work in progress. So, that's my goal for now. We'll see how that goes!